I always desire that this blog can serve as a place to write about my feelings and emotions, not just the fun stuff I experience, and that is what this post is all about.
Every week our church has the elders and the members of the worship team gather at the front of the sanctuary to be available for prayer. As we were leaving our seats Marcel tugged me to go receive prayer with him. Without knowing what he wanted prayer for, I was tugging him back--it's well out of my comfort zone to tell complete strangers my life story. Marcel just told the guy (a member of the worship team, and a fellow drummer) that we were asking for guidance in where our life was going next, with plans for a big move and that we desire to see God's hand in our decisions so that we are constantly on His path, not our own. This prayer led to tears for me, so we walked around the outside of church until we found a quiet place to sit, talk, and reflect.
Some big decisions were made that day, ones the assure me that we are indeed following God's will for our lives, together and individually, because they are big changes in what we had set out as our next steps. For instance, Marcel will not be continuing on with his education to obtain a Master's in Teaching. While he knows that is something he desires and is gifted to do, he feels that it is not the right time for it (how I can I say anything to that? I too wanted to take time off before I embarked on anymore school?) He will be looking for a job in the Boise area, as we both feel it is in our best interest to head out of the only area we've ever known together. It will give us a chance to experience something new together; even if I do know Idaho, I still feel that this time in Idaho will be far different than any other time I've been there. I think that Marcel has always known I am ready for a change in my employment it wasn't until that conversation where I could tell he understood why. I no longer want to stress all day Thursday waiting for an email with my work schedule praying that I will have enough hours to pay the bills. I no longer want to feel guilty about taking a weekend off because it may mean a paycheck that is way too small. I no longer want to leave the house at 8am and not return until 9pm for only 8 hours of work. While I realize I have a lot to be grateful for in that I do not only have 1 job in the economic situation our country is in, I have 2, I am excited to think about what opportunities are ahead of me. Through our nearly 4 months of marriage, I have seen more financial blessings than I ever thought someone could have over a much longer time period. Marcel has made me realize the importance of tithing. I have been in church my whole life and while I have sat through countless sermons on that very principle, I could never quite wrap my head around the fact that money would just appear out of nowhere if I gave the fair share to God first. It has been an eye-opening experience to always be blessed at just the right time in reward for our faithfulness. If I could only take away 1 thing from the short time we've been married, that would be it. I never felt that a short 30 minute conversation could hold so much meaning in the words we shared that day.
We pray every night that we'd hear and see from God daily and that He'd show us the path he has set out for us. After that time with my husband I know without a doubt that we in fact keeping God first in our relationship and that we are faithful to obey Him and the desires He has for us.
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